Being Connected

We live in a busy world.
Lots of rushing around.
So many responsibilities.


There's the stress that kids create in a marriage.
There's the concern over money issues.
There are in-law and out-law relationship battles.


How do you and your spouse stay connected?


1. Being connected to your spouse takes time.

2. Being connected to your spouse takes effort.

3. Being connected to your spouse takes perseverance.





From my research, and speaking with couples , I've found most do at least these three things to stay connected with each other (there are other things but these are the top three)

• Plan specific, daily time together ... as an example, one couple will dedicate the first 15 minutes when the husband comes home from work to lay together on their bed, close the door on the children, and talk together.


• Reminisce ... another couple will look through their picture albums to bring back all the happy memories from their life together and then post some of those pictures on their computer monitors as a screen saver


• Write notes ... sometimes those notes are informal sentences on a scrap of paper, or a quick email. Sometimes they're elaborate cards, and sometimes those notes are long letters of appreciation. The magic ingredient in every note is the tangible, written evidence of one spouse reaching out to the other to stay connected.

Do you want to stay connected with your spouse? Try one of these three actions.

Feeling connected to your spouse will create powerful opportunities to encourage. Encouragement can transform your life. So... Stay connected!

A simple gesture, done consistently...

Speaks Volumes!


An interesting (at least to me) concept has cropped up while I've been asking married couples this month to tell me the way they communicate their love to their spouse..


Couples will often have a gesture - or two - that has developed over time to communicate their love. Their solidarity. Their "couple-hood".


It takes a little while to uncover these gestures. When I first ask the couples they usually can't think of anything. They'll laugh, and shrug. They'll look at each other and smile.


Eventually they might suggest something small in a hesitant voice, assuming what they do can't be that important. Or we'll continue talking and I'll notice how they react to a shared story - and comment on the gesture they use. The couple will be surprised to realize that they do use this regularly.


Here's a few simple, consistent gestures some couples do to show their love to each other:



- a good morning kiss
- the ASL sign "I love you" across a crowded room
- knuckle to knuckle "punch" when in agreement
- a special wave (hand motion) when leaving
- a neck massage every now and again when driving long distance
- holding hands when walking





It's really interesting to see how spouses show their love - sometimes with gestures that are unconscious and unplanned, yet consistent.



How do you encourage your spouse with a simple, consistent gesture? Let me know - email Lori@EncourageYourSpouse.com!